The Things That Really Matters
- Aug 31, 2025
- 8 min read
My favourite thing to do with my dogs is to play together and that may seem trivial for some people but anyone who has ever struggled with playing together with their dog will definitely connect with what I am going to write next.
There is no better feeling than having your dog retrieve a toy to your hand, giving it to you, and telling you “I trust you so I am willing to share with you - let’s play more”.
Many dogs don’t retrieve all the way to the hand, they sometimes drop the toy on the ground, or try to tug more, or come and pull back when you send your hand… but when the game really goes well - when there is trust - you will get the ball TO YOUR HAND with joy and excitement.
My baby girl, Serpahina, she was born as a girl who doesn’t like to share, and this has been a skill I’ve been working on developing from the first moment, as you could see and read in this blog throughout our journey so far.
But at 6.5 months old, we made real progress.
We started with the ball, at first she played with her self in the retrieval, not trying hard to aim to my hand because she doesn’t need me to amuse herself, and slowly she started to put more effort into placing it exactly in my hand because she could see that I am telling her “I am not going to take it from you if we’re playing together, you have to show me that you really want to give it to me”
This is a HUGE step for a dog like her and I almost cried of joy when I saw how hard she is trying to work together 🫠
Dog training is about having patience and allowing your dog to think and not only to tell him what to do 100% of the time; but building the communication and connection that leads your dog to make the right decision by himself.
And while this “game” I played with her may be a bit boring and slower than what she likes - it was about accuracy and intention and from this point on, things became much better!
This week was also extra special because it was the first time I took Seraphina to my new dog dance studio!
At first, she explored the mirror, and that was honestly not her brightest hour. None of my dogs has ever behaved that way when spotting a mirror, and it was super weird for me because she has seen mirrors as a puppy 🙈 but, it is what it is.
She tried to play with her self and run with that mystery dog in front of her and even bumped in to the mirror, but it seems like nothing can stop her from being her true funny self.
I tried to work with her in the studio but it was a bit difficult for her, obviously with that dog running and moving around.
I started with the reinforce and release game so that she can explore the new environment in control, then some followups, and finally some tricks she knows good enough with breaks in between, but even that was maybe too much for her because it was overwhelming for her, I tried helping more with luring but the session was already a bit”broken” in my eyes.
Mid session - I tried to ask my self - what is your criteria, performing the tricks? Or is it the concentration? So I took a few steps back and started to point out that I am interested in her focus and not in perfect execution.
The moment I did that, and brought over the toy, it started to look differently. Because my goal changed. So here is my lesson from this session; it’s ok to change your goals, and change your mind in the middle, the bigger picture is more important than a moment in time and our mission should always be helping our dogs to improve and not about our ego and what we thought at first.
The next 15 years and our bond are more important than a momentary success at 6.5 months old and we have time to become the team I dream we will become, but it won’t happen unless I see her needs at all time!
I took a break, restarted and now I had another plan in mind. It was about playing and rewarding her for focusing on me and the retrieval rather than the mirror. About releasing her and making sure that she doesn’t look in to the mirror - so basically, I approached the mirror as another human and their dog playing next to us and we had to face that distraction.
Once I changed my state of mind, she changes hers and the session became much better for both of us!
When I felt she is more with me, I could go also back to the tricks and slowly I got closer to the mirror to teach her that she can handle that too!!! Easy? NOPE! But possible for sure!
The next day we went back to things we know, because if everyday I will “attack” her with the unfamiliar it will end up with frustration, so I’ve prepared the “backwards” settings and we started with a few repetitions, the line is slowly getting better but of course, far from perfect. I am hoping that in a few weeks, I would be able to work on the walking and not just on the end of the walk which is where we started from and where we’re still at.
Then, I changed to the front paws platform work, because I sometimes just feel she doesn’t think about which part of her body she should use and I really want her to master this skill. I also took the opportunity to work on changing to a “sit” position which is one of our conditioning tasks.
Another important training we had during the week was a whole pack training; this is how the whole pack learns to respect each other and not to fight over resources such as food or toys, and for Seraphina it’s a great time to learn to respect boundaries and also to “want” me more, because the other dogs are making me more attractive.
The nice part is that I am not asking for her attention most of the time, but she offers it and gets rewarded for it so she learns to also offer this behaviour. I also use it to work on her name recall when I think she will react so it’s a 6*WIN for all session 😂
I will admit that between her and Rhythm it’s a bit confusing for me since they both move so fast like two black spots but I am slowly getting better in recognising who is who.
For Seraphina it’s also great opportunity to react more calmly to street noises, since she is busy with the dogs and they don’t react on the noises so she leans something nice out of it.
And I know this blog is about Seraphina - but how sweet is Martha throughout this video? 🫠
The next day I worked a bit on sideways steps with her. I use a stair to mark the area where she should be, sort of a psychological barrier for her. Since she is a “stiff” dog and she is always ready for action, it’s a bit hard for her, but it’s a good opportunity to teach her to use her body properly and I try to reward the small moves as well, as much as I am able to see, at least. Again, we still have a long way to go but I am getting more and more proud of her progress and I am not referring only to the physical progress she is making!
After sideways, I started working on the first steps for a rollover. Tilting the head in a “down” position, and maybe even inserting the hip under the body. I know this trick could take a long time (with Rhythm it took almost 8 months) but I don’t mind the wait, she will learn it slowly until she feels good and able to do it, we are definitely not in a hurry for it.
After a few minutes break I wanted to do some heelwork with her, but I didn’t want to ask for it because maybe she wasn’t in the mood and I didn’t want to fail her, so instead of asking for heelwork, I simply started to reward a position, sort of shaping. I learned this from an obedience trainer last year and thought it can be nice to try with her, and I think it really was. I could see how happy she is about it and I think maybe for her it can be a complementary way to work on heelwork besides the normal way. After reinforcing the left heel position, I changed to between the legs and front position, these positions are easier for most dogs, and I could use a command and mostly get a good reaction for it, only problem was she was choking from the treat quite often so it was hard to keep a flow in the training.
To officially finish this great work-out, I took the ball, and worked on the accurate retrieval; placing it my hand will reward you with the ball in return, an attempt to bring it to my hand will give you a good vocal praise, but I cannot do anything with the ball, because you have to bring it all the way to my hand.
She has made a HUGE improvement in this one and I am so proud and happy! 🫠😍
During the weekend I wanted to do our conditioning class homework, but I am still not feeling super confident about handling her so it wasn’t so amazing and I could feel her discomfort because of my attitude so I stopped after 2-3 semi-successful repetitions.
The next evening I started from pivoting with front paws on a platform, I can really see the change that is starting to be shown in her motion, she is beginning to be more calculated about her moves, and I think she is on a really good path. After pivoting I did nose touch on platform, and she was a bit excited, but also good, because she is already really trying to push her nose, super big progress from before.
She couldn’t keep concentration the whole training, but it’s something that I am still learning to figure out - to know when she can do and what.
I find it very challenging, to train her.
Some days are amazing and some are so bad.
And I have to take responsibility for it all!
If we’re doing good - it’s because I am a good trainer.
And when the session isn't great - does it mean I am not good?
I think the biggest lesson training Seraphina teaches me - is about the colourful options in the world.
It’s not black and white, and it’s not good or bad.
It’s more than that,
there are options!!!!!!!!!!!!
it can be that I am good and I missed out on something, it can be that I was over pushing because I couldn’t see in live what I saw afterward, and it could be that it just didn’t since between us on that one time.
Either way,
I am grateful for this process, and I trust my self and Seraphina, that we will get to where we need to be. As for the time frame…..
I have no idea how it would be 😅